Stars and Boys on Stone Benches
by night-lock-hearts
Summary: Lily and James watch the stars on Christmas Eve. Oneshot.


Lily Evans turned around with such force that her flaming red hair swished around in the air. Her big eyes, shining like emeralds despite the twilight, darted around in the semi dark until she found the thing that had startled her.

A boy was standing behind her, tall, smirking and beautiful, with the messy curls on his head blowing in the wind. He was dressed in a black coat, with a red and golden scarf carelessly thrown around his neck. He took a step towards her.

"James," Lily said. "You scared me."

"My apologies, m'am," James answered, steam coming out of his mouth as he spoke, he walked up to the stone bench she was sitting on and sat down beside her.

Lily Evans had attended Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry for six and a half years, and still she the view took her breath away. The sight of the big lake, now surfaced with clear thick ice, the trees in the Dark Forest covered in white sparkling snow, the warm lights from the windows of Hagrid's hut, and most of all the high sky, sometimes full of owls, sometimes stained with millions of stars, it really was breathtaking. She could look at it for hours, just sit in the windowsill of her dormitory and look at it all. She never got tired of it.

"It's a little cold to watch the sunset, don't you think?"

There was indeed a sunset, and it was a very beautiful one at that, colouring the sky with shades of golden and red and purple and blue, reflected in the snow. But the sunset wasn't what had lured Lily Evans out in the freezing air this evening.

"I haven't watched sunsets since I was thirteen," she informed James, who smirked again.

"What are you doing out here then, Evans?"

Lily pressed her lips together and tried to as discreet as possible cover the remains of the four cigarettes she had smoked before James had interrupted her with her foot.

"I just... enjoy being alone sometimes, that's all." This was partly true, so Lily didn't bother blushing over her lie. She just kept gazing out over the dark grounds, little puffs of steam coming from her nose as she breathed.

Suddenly it occurred to her that James was sitting very close to her, their thighs touching. It also occurred to her that he hadn't seemed to want anything in particular, he just sat there silently on the bench, looking out over the forest, his spectacles fogging up with each breath.

"What are you doing out here yourself?" Lily demanded, mostly to break the silence.

James shrugged.

"Just enjoy being alone sometimes," he mumbled. Lily considered snorting, but remained silent. After a while, she stuck her hand in the pocket of her robes and pulled out the half empty pack of cigarettes.

"Want a cigarette?" James turned to stare at her, his dark eyebrows raised. At last he nodded and pulled out a cigarette from the pack, and Lily did the same. She lit them with her wand. They smoked in silence for some time, watching the dark fall over the grounds, before James sighed and leaned back against the bench.

"So were you planning on telling me why you're sitting alone out here in the cold smoking?"

"Not really", Lily answered, taking another deep flare on her cigarette.

"Didn't think so," James said, sounding just a little bit disappointed.

Lily sighed. She turned away from him and went back to looking at the breathtaking view. The first stars were starting to become visible, the big half moon already high in the sky. This reminded her of something.

"Were you planning on telling me why you and your friends always mysteriously disappear whenever there's a full moon, and why there are hideous sounds from The Shrieking Shack, and why Remus always misses classes the first days after? Oh, and why he got an O on the essay about werewolves when everybody else got an A at most?"

At first, James stared at the girl beside him, looking terrified. But then he relaxed a little, and a small smile became visible on his face. Not that she was looking.

"So you've figured that out, have you?" he asked quietly, but it sounded more like a statement.

"Yes."

"When?"

"Oh, ages ago" she waved her hand indefinably, sounding irritated.

"Not bad, Evans."

Lily ignored this.

"So? Were you planning on ever telling me?"

James sighed. "Not really."

Lily took one last drag from her cigarette before letting it fall to the ground and crushing it with her shoe.

"Didn't think so." Her voice was harsh and and a bit more cynical then she'd intended, but she didn't really care. James threw his hands up, an offended look on his face as he turned to her.

"Oh, come on, Lily, that's not fair! I couldn't tell you about it, I swore- we all swore that we wouldn't tell anyone! No one can know about this, you get that, right?"

"I'm not an idiot, James."

"Right... Sorry."

They were quiet again. Lily wasn't really angry at him for keeping the secret from her. She understood why he hadn't been able to tell her, and to be honest she hadn't really expected him to either. But she was angry. She was in a very bad mood, and she needed someone to take out her anger on.

The dark sky was full of stars now, twinkling and shining, never ending lights. Every evening when she sat in the windowsill they were there. She had even began to recognize some constellations.

Lily felt as if the night sky was her own. She felt like the only one who really cared to look at it, not just throw a glance when you passed a window, but really look. So much and so often that you even started to recognize constellations. She cared about the stars, and sometimes she thought the stars cared about her too. They always showed up.

And then, shifting her emerald gaze to the boy beside her, Lily realised something.

James always showed up. He always did. Maybe not at times when she expected him to, but whenever she really needed him, he would be there. He always showed up.

James Potter cared about her.

And that was why he was right now sitting on a cold stone bench in the winter night, probably freezing his butt off, waiting for her to tell him what was wrong, instead of having Christmas dinner in the great hall with his friends.

James Potter cared about her.

Lily Evans had attended Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry for six and a half years, and for the first time, the boy on the bench beside her took her breath away.

And right there and then, Lily decided to trust James Potter.

She moved closer, rested her head on his shoulder, and told him.

"My dad is dead."

She could feel James turn his head to look down at her. She looked at her stars.

"I'm really sorry, Evans."

"I know," she mumbled. Everyone was really sorry. Lily was really sorry too.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really."

James was quiet for a little while. His cold hand found hers under her robes. She took it.

"Want to smoke?"

Lily smiled.

"Yes."

And so it was, that on Christmas Eve, James Potter became Lily Evans' own favourite star.


End file.
